![]() Using work as an example, you might think, “I should do everything right so that I’m valued and admired.” As a result, you might be terrified of failure-falling short on a project or not immediately having the “right” answer. Icebergs usually fall into three categories: achievement, social, or control.Īchievement Icebergs often come into play at work or in any situation where you have an important role. To identify Iceberg Beliefs, start by observing your thoughts. If you begin screaming at a traffic light, well, you’ve hit an Iceberg. Let’s say you’re late for work, but you believe you always need to be on time. Usually it feels absolute and includes words such as “must” or “should.” It also produces a strong emotional response when you run up against it. Just like you know a closet is too cluttered when you can’t open it, an Iceberg Belief has telltale signs, too. When we become aware of our Iceberg Beliefs, we can gain more control over our emotions and our lives. But it’s possible to steer around Icebergs, so they don’t hit us when we least expect it. At the same time, those subconscious thoughts also tend to take charge of our emotions. ![]() Icebergs are tricky, because 99 percent of them lie beneath the surface of our awareness. For example: “I should take charge of this situation, because nobody else will,” or “I can’t let anyone see me upset at work.” Until one day, you open the door, and those shoes tumble out.Īt meQuilibrium, we think of these deeply held beliefs as Iceberg Beliefs, or deeply entrenched rules about how we believe the world should be and how we and others should behave. Often, when intrusive thoughts pop up, we shove them aside-like piling old shoes into a closet. There’s no formula for folding our worries into thirds and no foolproof method to organize the junk drawer of our minds. There are plenty of ways to clean out your physical space. Advice from the best-selling book “The Home Edit.” Gigantic trash bags. Tips from organizing consultant Marie Kondo.
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